time (out)

so finite

so fleeting

listen

hear it

the slow,

steady

tick

tock

the timer

set long ago

forgotten now

there won't be enough time

imagine the next breath you take

is to be your last...changes things, doesn't it?

you can't buy any more than you have. ever.

justifying your future to validate your past

tilting at windmills, wasting your moments

rules to a game you never asked to play

so stop playing

walk away...now

take your life and go

you can...it's your life

live for today

yesterday's gone

no promise of tomorrow

know yourself

always make it count

this is not a test

don't leave your life

unlived...

it doesn't fail you

you fail it

illusion

I'm starting to think love is an illusion, just an apparition to occupy your mind while your life slips away. I've given and given and ask only to get as good as I give. The world is too caught up in it's selfish pursuits to see the big picture. We facebook and we tweet, but we refuse to be part of a real, challenging, requires-some-assembly relationship. Love lost is our loss...

wonderment (unfinished)

almost touching

you and I

soft and sexy

tactile sensation

burns so hot

feeling vertigo

spinning and dizzy

brought on by....

lost in this wonderment

my awe has been struck

knowing and doing

two entirely different aspects

my heart gets away from me

...secretly...I let it go

I won't slow my roll

no interest in stopping

if you won't keep up

you'll get left behind

pay attention

look alive

know the difference

between wants and needs

sometimes you need a want

don't watch as it slips away

my brother

anthony scott

november 15, 1971 - january 11, 2012

born in biloxi mississippi

the youngest of three boys

a beautiful soul who never understood the world

...nor the world him

I remember this August afternoon, last time we were together...

I'll miss you bro. It was a lovely train wreck.

at least you're free...

scott and daughter kayla fall 2011...............me...................my brother

no limits, no fear

sometimes

when it's quiet

I think I can hear

ghosts of my life creeping up on me

quiet footfalls of the choices I live in

I've never been happier

or more scared the sky is falling

choices, the idea of what can be

there's safety in the way you look at me

terror in the starkness of that beauty

excited and unsteady

drunk on the possibilities

your smile, my hope for tomorrow

feel my heart, pounding out a rhythm

pieces of me, coming together, almost whole

something so simple

my voice shakes

when I speak of home...

yeah...

new skin

...the start of a new year

the opportunity to begin anew

take it, embrace it, live it...

ours

do you hear the background noise?

living in the shadows of our fear

go ahead

let it go

it never mattered

watch it fall away

the world stops to watch

through rose colored lenses

feeling our love

intense and transparent

learning to walk

again

stumbling

changing our life's purpose

run towards me, not away

this is not an exercise

in futility

this is life and it's so real

feeling the need, sealing our faith

counting our lucky scars

breaking the surface

coming up for air

breathing (for the first time)

lightning crashing around us

we fall in surrender

kiss me

feeling it

every time I think of you

my heart swells, pounding

dancing joyously in my chest

whenever I ponder what might be

my mind wanders/wonders

lost in a daydream of possibility

thoughts of you come faster and faster

taking me, stealing my breath, lifting me up

leaving me starry eyed and (magnificently) distracted

is this what I think it is? no....couldn't be (could it?)

it's been so long since I've felt this way

it's a warm, wonderful, unfamiliar feeling

like the embrace of God, so inviting

do you feel it too? or is it just a trick of my heart?

I've been deceived before, betrayed by my hopes

sometimes you want something so badly

you're willing to run toward the mirage...so thirsty

but I feel you so this can't be a mirage (can it?)

run with me and let's find out together

I know it's scary, I get that...so what?

if you hold my hand and look me in the eyes

feel the touch of my lips on yours, so soft

trust in your heart as I have come to

the world only holds the power we give it

let's take it back, let's live this dream

nothing is more courageous than real love

and you haven't lived/loved until you've felt it

it lives in the dream of your kiss...

boxing paul

...and if sometimes, I can't seem to talk

you'll know this blackboard lacks a piece of chalk...

Stan Ridgeway

falling

life

shot from a cannon

hitting the wall

breaking the waves

exhilaration

driven by urgency

desperation (fear, it's always fear)

driven by history

looking as I leap

have mercy on me

watching your shadow pass

the faith is in my fall

caught up in connection

can't catch my breath

pieces of me tumbling

head over heals

(careful what you wish for)

make me scream

dance with my soul

make that leap of faith

I love this part...

been a while

my mind is quiet, my soul subdued

not sure I like this...I miss the chaos

more to come

shine with me

like old varnish

colors mutate

belief will fade

love can fail

shining bright

like the sun

resigned to go down

breathe it in

while it lasts

when it's gone

climb to the top (alone)

look around

everything comes

at a price

sun sets earlier

as autumn arrives

moon chasing it down

dark and lonely

never ending pursuit

beauty...almost

always dies first

take me in

make us whole

keep it in faith

holy and sacred

let's fill this space

with all we can be

holding it close

transported

When I woke up this morning, the world felt right. Sometimes you have to put your life in perspective, you have to look at the highs and the lows and realize that even though it isn't perfect, it's pretty damn good. You wake up and have a cup of coffee, knowing you are loved and feel the warmth of the sun on your face and in your life.

I like where I am, I like what I do and I like where it's going. I'm inspired by green eyes and clear thoughts. Good days being followed by great days. I feel it. Bring it...

your green eyes

green eyes

not

just a color a mood

sometimes in the middle of...

strange

out of place

you've touched me

reached right out

grabbed me

I sense my grasp on reality.........slipping

I know the love I feel is real

yours mine ours

is it the same for you?

does your mind play tricks on me

excitement making you anxious to know

love can feel like a bus

running me over or

a wind

lifting me like a leaf, gently

blowing me in your direction

often

I can't tell the difference

help me feel this, make it real

please

refugee

I lie awake

night enveloping me

thoughts of you creep in

stealing my heart's fear

longing for your touch

soft and sweet, purposeful

friend, lover, savior

insecurities melt away

wish I were with you

closing the distance

discovering our potential

detaching from the pain

passion is hard to find

even harder to hold

you give me faith

we give me hope

live, love, learn with me

don't fear the night

it belongs to us now

stay and burn...

like a house on fire