Wednesday, January 11, 2012

my brother


anthony scott

november 15, 1971 - january 11, 2012

born in biloxi mississippi
the youngest of three boys
a beautiful soul who never understood the world
...nor the world him

I remember this August afternoon, last time we were together...

I'll miss you bro. It was a lovely train wreck.

at least you're free...

scott and daughter kayla fall 2011...............me...................my brother

Friday, January 6, 2012

no limits, no fear



sometimes
when it's quiet
I think I can hear
ghosts of my life creeping up on me
quiet footfalls of the choices I live in

I've never been happier
or more scared the sky is falling
choices, the idea of what can be
there's safety in the way you look at me
terror in the starkness of that beauty

excited and unsteady
drunk on the possibilities
your smile, my hope for tomorrow
feel my heart, pounding out a rhythm
pieces of me, coming together, almost whole

something so simple
my voice shakes
when I speak of home...


yeah...


Monday, January 2, 2012

new skin



...the start of a new year
the opportunity to begin anew
take it, embrace it, live it...

Sunday, December 11, 2011

ours



do you hear the background noise?
living in the shadows of our fear

go ahead
let it go
it never mattered
watch it fall away

the world stops to watch
through rose colored lenses
feeling our love
intense and transparent

learning to walk
again
stumbling
changing our life's purpose

run towards me, not away
this is not an exercise
in futility
this is life and it's so real

feeling the need, sealing our faith
counting our lucky scars

breaking the surface
coming up for air

breathing (for the first time)

lightning crashing around us
we fall in surrender

kiss me


Saturday, December 3, 2011

feeling it


every time I think of you
my heart swells, pounding
dancing joyously in my chest
whenever I ponder what might be
my mind wanders/wonders
lost in a daydream of possibility
thoughts of you come faster and faster
taking me, stealing my breath, lifting me up
leaving me starry eyed and (magnificently) distracted

is this what I think it is? no....couldn't be (could it?)
it's been so long since I've felt this way
it's a warm, wonderful, unfamiliar feeling
like the embrace of God, so inviting
do you feel it too? or is it just a trick of my heart?
I've been deceived before, betrayed by my hopes
sometimes you want something so badly
you're willing to run toward the mirage...so thirsty
but I feel you so this can't be a mirage (can it?)

run with me and let's find out together
I know it's scary, I get that...so what?
if you hold my hand and look me in the eyes
feel the touch of my lips on yours, so soft
trust in your heart as I have come to
the world only holds the power we give it
let's take it back, let's live this dream
nothing is more courageous than real love
and you haven't lived/loved until you've felt it

it lives in the dream of your kiss...


Friday, December 2, 2011

boxing paul



...and if sometimes, I can't seem to talk
you'll know this blackboard lacks a piece of chalk...

Stan Ridgeway

Saturday, November 26, 2011

falling


life
shot from a cannon
hitting the wall
breaking the waves

exhilaration
driven by urgency
desperation (fear, it's always fear)
driven by history

looking as I leap
have mercy on me
watching your shadow pass
the faith is in my fall

caught up in connection
can't catch my breath
pieces of me tumbling
head over heals

(careful what you wish for)

make me scream
dance with my soul
make that leap of faith
I love this part...



Tuesday, November 22, 2011

been a while



my mind is quiet, my soul subdued
not sure I like this...I miss the chaos

more to come

Sunday, November 6, 2011

shine with me



like old varnish
colors mutate
belief will fade
love can fail
shining bright
like the sun
resigned to go down

breathe it in
while it lasts
when it's gone
climb to the top (alone)
look around
everything comes
at a price

sun sets earlier
as autumn arrives
moon chasing it down
dark and lonely
never ending pursuit
beauty...almost
always dies first

take me in
make us whole
keep it in faith
holy and sacred
let's fill this space
with all we can be
holding it close

transported



When I woke up this morning, the world felt right. Sometimes you have to put your life in perspective, you have to look at the highs and the lows and realize that even though it isn't perfect, it's pretty damn good. You wake up and have a cup of coffee, knowing you are loved and feel the warmth of the sun on your face and in your life.

I like where I am, I like what I do and I like where it's going. I'm inspired by green eyes and clear thoughts. Good days being followed by great days. I feel it. Bring it...


Friday, November 4, 2011

your green eyes



green eyes
not
just a color a mood

sometimes in the middle of...
strange
out of place

you've touched me
reached right out
grabbed me
I sense my grasp on reality.........slipping

I know the love I feel is real
yours mine ours
is it the same for you?

does your mind play tricks on me
excitement making you anxious to know
love can feel like a bus
running me over or
a wind
lifting me like a leaf, gently
blowing me in your direction
often
I can't tell the difference

help me feel this, make it real

please



Tuesday, November 1, 2011

refugee



I lie awake
night enveloping me
thoughts of you creep in
stealing my heart's fear

longing for your touch
soft and sweet, purposeful
friend, lover, savior
insecurities melt away

wish I were with you
closing the distance
discovering our potential
detaching from the pain

passion is hard to find
even harder to hold
you give me faith
we give me hope

live, love, learn with me
don't fear the night
it belongs to us now
stay and burn...

like a house on fire

Saturday, October 22, 2011

the weight



breathe
calm down
stop
just stop

somehow
my enthusiasm
makes you uncomfortable
why?
is it the intrusion?
(your life's a prize?)
what is it about
emotion
that creeps you out?
is it the exposure?
vulnerability?
responsibility?

you really want
reward without
risk
sensation without
stimulation
love without
exposure

where's the adventure in that?



Friday, October 21, 2011

fate loves the fearless

this would be so much easier if I could only stop caring...but you give me hope (damn you)
...why does asking for your love make me weak?

more to come...


Sunday, October 16, 2011

the unknown


there is no safety in the unknown
but it is our only hope
live and love fearlessly